Set the Limit Once, Then Follow Through

Parents will complain that their child does not listen to them or does not do the things they are told to do.  Think about this.  You are in the store shopping and your child is whining and begging for an item.  You say “Stop that or we will leave.”  Your child continues and you continue to say “Do you want to leave?  We will leave if you don’t stop it. “The child stops for a little bit and then starts in again and you say it again “We are going to leave.”  You do leave when your shopping trip is complete.  Think about it.  Your child will not listen and do what they are told because you did not do what you said you were going to do.  They don’t have to listen because you don’t follow through on what you said you were going to do.  Children pick this up VERY quickly.  So make sure when you set the limit (rule), you follow through with it. 

Mary Bartusek, Parent Educator

Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear

Here is a song you can move to! Do the actions with a special teddy bear!

Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear turn around.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear touch the ground.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear close your eyes
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear reach for the sky.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear bend your knees.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear sit like me!

Be a Broken Record......

Repeat the Rule, Repeat the Rule, Repeat the Rule

How many times have you been able to learn a new concept or skill by only hearing the instructions one time?  It can be very difficult to remember and get all the information correct by only hearing it once.  Research tells us that the brain will remember information better if it is repeated at least 3 times.  We need to repeat rules over and over for our children.  They need to hear it many times.  There is also a big difference between hearing and doing.  Habits are formed when the same action is completed 30 to 40 times.  So keep that in mind when you have to tell and make sure your child puts the toys away, hangs up their backpack, uses words instead of hitting or any other rule you have in your home.

 

Mary Bartusek, Parent Educator

Airplane Flying

Airplane flying through the sky
Zoom, zoom
Airplane flying throught the sky
Zoom, zoom
Flying high, flying low
Flying round the world we go
Airplane flying through the sky
Zoom, zoom!!

If You Say It, You Better Mean It

Many times parents will threaten children hoping that the child will do as the parent requested.  Sometimes we say things that are kind of crazy and don’t make much sense or we may promise our children something or say we will do something and then not do it.  You want your children to know that you are reliable and you mean what you say.  When you say something and then you don’t do it your child learns that your words do not mean anything and that you don’t do what you say.  You are unpredictable and you are not to be trusted.  Is that the message you want your child to hear? 

 

So make sure if you say it, you mean it!

Mary Bartusek, Parent Educator

Slippery Fish!!

This is one of our favorite songs at ECFE. Here is a video with the words, pictures, and actions!

Have a great day!
Britt

Happy Thanksgiving!

From all of us at ECFE, we hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving with your families. Think about what you are thankful for and talk with your children about what it means to be thankful.

Instead of "No!"

When we are caught off guard our “gut” response many times is “No!”  We then may give in after really thinking about it and realize we could have said “Yes.”  The child learns that a “No” may not really mean “No.”  Listen first and save the “No” for when you really mean it.

Say:

“Tell me more”

“Yes later”

“Give me a minute”

“Tomorrow”

“Maybe”

“We can talk about it later.”

“I need to think about that.”

Have a great day!

-Mary

5 Senses

At ECFE we are talking about our 5 Senses. There is a song we will be singing at circle time and here are the words. It is sung to the tune of Frere Jacques.

5 Senses, 5 Senses (Hold up hand showing 5 fingers)
We have them, we have them (Point to self)
Seeing, hearing, touching (Point to corresponding body parts)
Tasting and smelling (Point to corresponding body parts)
There are 5, there are 5! (Hold up hand showing 5 fingers)

November Parenting Tip

Developing Listening Skills

Facts about communication skills:

à 45% of our day we listen

à 30% of our day we speak

à 16% of our day we read

à 9% of our day we write

à We spend the least amount of time teaching a skill that we use the most of!

à Listening is a learned skill.

à Through focused and directed efforts, parents can teach their children better listening habits.

Reasons Kids Don’t Listen

 

à Kids have poor attention spans.

à Kids are focused on something else.

à Kids are not warned ahead of time.

à Kids are tired, hungry, not feeling well.

à Child could have a hearing, attention, or processing issue.

à Parents talk too much.

à Parents can be critical, judgmental, and nagging.

à Parents tell kids what to do all the time.

à Parents words do not mean anything.

à Parents do not follow through.

à Parents do not listen well so child does not listen well.

à Parents are distracted with their own issues, needs, and wants.

Ways to help your child listen better:

à Listen to your child the way you want them to listen to you

à Make eye contact

à Bend down and get to their eye level

à Do not interrupt

à Watch your tone of voice

à Be aware of your facial reactions

à See things from your child’s perspective

à Know when to talk and when not to talk

à Compliment your child when they display good listening habits

à Talk less, use fewer words

à Ask child to summarize what you said

à Use gentle touch to gain their attention

à Stop what you are doing and focus on them

à Be firm, clear, simple

à Say it only once and then take action

Listening is a skill that is essential for school success. It is a key to good communication. It is a tool needed to build and maintain relationships with people.

Mary Bartusek, Parent Educator
(952)-758-1673

What You Say I Am...That is What I Am

AVOID NEGATIVE LABELS

“You little devil.”

“You are so naughty.”

“She is shy.”

“You are so whiny.”

Children will become the label that we use for them.  When we expect the worst, the worst will happen.  When we expect the best, the best will happen.  Be careful how you describe your child.  They are listening!

-Mary

One Potato, Two Potato

This is a quick little song we do to learn different body parts and it also teaches rhythm. You put your hands into fists and the first time you pound them on top of each other while singing:

One pototo, two potato,
Three potato, four,
Five potato, six potato,
Seven potato, more!

Then, you can have your child come up with different body parts where you can "pound the potatoes" while you sing the song. You can use shoulders, cheeks, feet, back, or any other body parts they come up with!

Happy singing!
Britt

Ask Yourself....

“DOES IT REALLY MATTER?” OR “DOES IT JUST ANNOY YOU?”

While your child is in bed they sing and talk- does it matter or just annoy you?

Your child puts on mismatched clothes- does it matter or just annoy you?

Your child spills some water as they are filling their own glass- does it matter or just annoy you?

Your baby has a blow out dirty diaper- does it matter or just annoy you?

Many times parents can get very upset about things that really are more annoying to us than what really matters in life.  Keep in mind what really matters!

-Mary

Wiggles Out!

This is a song we sing with our older ECFE classes. We sing it every week before we sit down to read a book. Here are the words, followed by a video.

Wiggles Out

Clap your hands,
Stomp your feet,
Wiggle all around.

Reach your hands up in the air
and now let's touch the ground.

Hold your hips,
Hold your head,
Give yourself a hug.

Sit right down,
Eyes to look,
It's time to read a book!

Have a good week!
Miss Britt

Grandma's Rule: "When.....Then"

 

Get children to do a task by telling them what to do and then what will happen.

*When you finish putting away the cars, then we can go outside.

*When you brush your teeth, then you can choose 2 books for me to read to you.

*When you talk nicely, then I will listen to you.”

*When you go potty on the toilet, then I will give you a sticker.”

 

 

Have a great day!

Mary

 

Spiders!

Since Halloween is just two days away, I thought I would share two songs about creepy, crawly spiders!

This is one everyone knows but the actions are great for fine motor development!



The Itsy Bitsy Spider

The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout.

Down came the rain and washed the spider out.

Out came the sun and dried up all the rain,

And the itsy bitsy spider went up the spout again.

The second song is one we do at ECFE with a spider on a stick. It is a fun way to learn body parts.



There's a Spider on My Head*

There’s a spider on my head, on my head.

There’s a spider on my head, on my head.

There’s a spider on my head, there’s a spider on my head,

There’s a spider on my head, on my head.

*Knee, toes, elbow, hand, shoulder, leg, arm, chin, any body parts…

Happy Halloween!

Miss Britt

October Parenting Tip

Encouraging Self Help Skills

 

The weather is getting colder!  Here come the coats, hats, mittens, and boots.  Well, hopefully, no boots for a while!  It is the perfect time to start teaching your child some self-help skills.  Yes, you can do it faster than they can, but they need to start learning how to do it on their own!  Children become more independent and confident as they learn to do more for themselves.  Dressing and grooming skills are learned by early and consistent routines in which children are expected to gradually become more and more independent.  Start now!  Kids will not learn how to do these tasks unless someone teaches them how and lets them try it and practice it.

  

Check out this link for a short video on how to teach your child to put on their coat http://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=434598023253630&id=173804442657081.  It’s a fun and fast trick!  Make sure the coat is the correct size.  It is incredibly frustrating for a child when the fit is not correct.

 

Mittens are much easier for children to put on then gloves.  Getting those fingers in the right spot can be frustrating for kids and parents.  Remember slip-on or velcro boots are much easier than tying.

 

Zipping

This can be a difficult task.  Start the zipper for them.  Only zip it up a little bit and let them do the rest!  Have your child unzip when they take off their coat.  Once they get the feel of how the zipper slides you can starting working on getting the zipper connected.  Encourage your child to bring the sides of the coat together at the bottom and “match up” the zipper case.  While they are holding the bottom of the jacket with one hand, have them pull the zipper up with the other hand.  You may have to hold the coat down for them a few times.  Put some Vaseline on the teeth of the zipper, it really does help the sliding process!

  

Parents need to be:

• Patient—it takes a lot of practice.
• Praising—everyone loves to hear when they are trying hard or doing the task  correctly.
• Consistent—don’t make them do it one day and then do it for them another day.
• Reasonable—allow for more time and don’t expect them to get it all right away. 

For further information, questions, or

concerns, you can contact

Mary Bartusek, Parent Educator,

at 952-758-1673 or email Mary at

mabartusek@np.k12.mn.us 

 

Don't Ask.....Tell

Many times parents ask their children questions or imply they have a choice when really the parent does not want the child to choose.  Be very careful!

*“Do you want to eat lunch now?”  I really meant …”It’s time to eat lunch!”

*“Do you want to leave the park?”  I really meant….”We are leaving the park in 5 minutes” or “We are leaving the park after 2 more times down the slide.”

*”Are you tired?  Do you want to go to bed?”  I really meant…”Go pick out a book it is time for bed.” or “I will help you put on your pajamas.  It is time for bed.”

*Also do not end sentences with “Ok.”  It implies the child can choose.

“It’s time to eat lunch, Ok?”  “We are leaving in 5 minutes, Ok?”  “It’s time to pick up toys, OK?” 

 

 

STOP saying OK!

 

-Mary Bartusek

5 Little Hotdogs

Hold one hand flat and put your other hand on top with your fingers spread out. Those fingers are your "hot dogs".

 

 

Five little hotdogs frying in a pan.  The oil got hot and one went BAM!

Four little hotdogs frying in a pan. The oil got hot and one went BAM!

 

Three little hotdogs frying in a pan. The oil got hot and one went BAM!

Two little hotdogs frying in a pan. The oil got hot and one went BAM!

 

One little hotdog frying in a pan. The oil got hot and one went BAM!

 

No little hotdogs frying in a pan.  The oil got hot and the pan went BAM!

 

As you countdown, ask child to tell you have many are left. Can they show you on their hand?

Happy MEA!

ECFE and our District Preschools will be off for the week of October 15-19. Enjoy the time off and go do something fun! :)

See you next week for Music Monday and Tip Tuesday.

Britt

SAVE THE DATE!

We have an event coming up that you are not going to want to miss!!

The Annual ECFE Halloween Party is just around the corner! On Friday, October 26th from 6-8 PM parents and their children up to kindergarten age are welcome to come to the Central Education Campus gym to have a non-scary night of fun. We will have a fun and engaging storytime, games, a photo spot, and goody bags to take home! Come dressed in your costume and show it off. :)

It is such a fun night that we look forward to every fall. Hope to see you there!

Monkey See: Monkey Do!

MONKEY SEE:  MONKEY DO!

Your child learns from you!  They will repeat and do things you do everyday.  So if you don’t’ want your child to hit, say bad words, or be angry and yell then you need to not do these things either.  Children absorb the words and actions around them.  They will act like you! So be careful and think about your behavior.

-Mary

Hippopotamus

Happy Monday!

Time for me to share another song with you. This week, I am sharing the Hippopotamus Song. It is definitely one of the favorites at ECFE. Here are the words:

Hippopotamus Song

A hip, a hip, a hippopotamus,

Got up, got up, got up upon the bus.

And all the children on the bus said,

“Move over you’re squishing us!”

A cow, a cow, a cow got on the bus,

A cow, a cow, a cow got on the bus.

And all the children on the bus said,

“Moo-ve over, moo-ve over!”

A sheep, a sheep, a sheep got on the bus,

A sheep, a sheep, a sheep got on the bus.

And all the children on the bus said,

“Baa-ck up, baa-ck up!”

 

A snake, a snake, a snake got on the bus,

A snake, a snake, a snake got on the bus.

And all the children on the bus said,

“Ssss-it down, ssss-it down!”

 

 

 

Bonus! I did this song last week with the Peek Into Preschool class and videotaped it so you can learn the tune.

 

 

 

Enjoy!
Miss Britt